Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Elevator Story

I know, right? One is missing.  Use your imagination, perhaps I'm sitting on her.
Yesterday, I opened my wings and gently gathered all my little chickies  around me at the pediatrician's office for strep tests.
If you'd ever like to be truly grossed out,
 go on Google Images and type in Strep Throat.
Only two babes were positive. (Also I've had it since Saturday.)  That's good.  And that's not the real story.  

Also, it's true that sometimes one has to wait a long time in the doctor's office.  We didn't.  Nope, they got us in and out of there REAL quick-like, uh-huh.  But that's not the story, either.

I didn't realize the true story in this experience until it hit me last night just as I turned the corner on sleep.  

By Jeri Keeley

The Elevator Ride

Me: "Quit pushing buttons, honey."

One man steps on, smiles kindly and moves to the corner.  The door closes.  There are 10 people on the elevator.  Eight of them are children.  My children.  All of the buttons are, of course, lit.

Me:  "Please don't even think about putting that in your mouth"

Several kids do a strategic jump as the elevator starts to descend.

K: "Was everyone in that office there getting strep tests like us?"
Uncomfortable silence.  (I didn't even correct her grammar.)  I stare at the floor.

P: "Hey, that looks, like MY blanket!  You have my blanket, that's my special 'throw-up' blanket from the hospital!  MOM!  Make her give me my blanket back!  It has my germs on it!  (The hospital was 8 years ago.  Her voice is loud.)
K:  "No!  I had to get a shot!  I used it to hide on the floor!  Stupid school nurse! (That's another story; we missed a Kindergarten shot.  Dang. Now she's current, but she was not happy, no sir.)

Fighting over the blanket--fragmented screams concerning who is sickest--me trying to explain that I JUST WASHED THE BLANKET.  Man in corner grows smaller, somehow.

Elevator door opens, a sandal flies out, and a little hand grabs it just in time.  People waiting to get on wisely decide to continue waiting.  Mr. Cool manages to look somehow as though he's never seen any of us in his entire lifetime.

S: "Look, guys, we can make it move if we all jump at the same time!"
K:  shrieking:  "NOOO!!! That's too much!  It's gonna fall!"

Me:  "You're maybe getting too big to do that, buddy.  I'm gettin' seasick.  Let's all just stand real still and listen for the ding so we can get off."

The bell dings.  We step off, I chase the Caboose through the parking lot.  But what happened to the nice man from the elevator?  Wish I'd stopped to look back, maybe wink or something.  Also wish I'd had a camera.

Sorry nice man.  

Bet you take the stairs next time.  

If you start feeling puny, you might want to get checked for strep.
Plus, sometimes I have to giggle about what just happened to you.  You really had no idea.

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