Monday, January 15, 2024

2023 Family Newsletter

 2023 Keeley Family Newsletter


๐ŸŽตThe wheels on the bus went round and round this year. Round and round, round and round. The Keeleys on the bus went up and down. All through the year. ๐ŸŽต


๐ŸŽตThe accountant on the bus will tell you that for every tax problem there is a solution that is straightforward, uncomplicated, and wrong. ๐ŸŽต

Sam received his Bachelors in Accounting from USU, secured a job and will begin his Master's degree after tax season. He's still the king of board games.  


๐ŸŽตAnden i bussen sagde kvak kvak kvak.๐ŸŽต

Kate (15) decided to learn Danish. She's been studying it daily for over two years with an app on her phone. She also did robotics, weight lifting, baseball (first girl to pitch for her school!), and started driving.

Katie's always been a bit of an odd duck in the very best way; she once even wrote a personal manifesto poem around a silly duck hat she wears. Basically, she's a smart STEM girl with her own quirky style; take her or leave her.

We decided to take her: to Denmark. We (7 of us) had a glorious trip; visited old churches, Tivoli park, viking museums, the beach, LegoLand, and the Lego House. There we bought Katie a Lego House Exclusive model DUCK signed by its creator. How cool is that!?!


๐ŸŽตThe Ladies on the bus go wah, wah, wah. Nah. ํ•œ๊ตญ ๋ฐฐ์šฐ๋“ค์ด ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ์„น์‹œํ•˜๋‹ค! ๐ŸŽต

In yet another chapter of "You Can't Make This $#:! Up," Becky was diagnosed with breast cancer. She mostly recovered in time for the court date from the auto crash, which was completely exhausting. November brought her  first run-in with COVID. She's very resilient.

She also watched about a zillion Korean shows with the ladies in her club, had monthly culinary adventures with our niece Mari, and wrote her weekly newsletter. She can't keep a secret to save her life, and the kids have been merciless when Becky revealed a plot ending and ruined a surprise. It's been fun to have her here for many reasons, but one of the best is that we have seen family whom we normally wouldn't.


๐ŸŽต The naturalist on the buszzzzzz…๐ŸŽต

Liz has also shown a lot of resilience this year. She possibly found THE migraine medicine and was feeling so much better until she also got stupid COVID…

Liz has an actual greenhouse in her room for her pet plants, and she spent her waking daylight hour(s) outside in the garden this year with her herbs. Becky’s cat Shiloh has decided that fresh 

catnip is the BEST! Liz's still the animal whisperer and has taught Rocco to "Trick or Treat." She's an excellent groomer when she feels good enough to do it. There's a neighbor dog that can't walk past our cul-de-sac without dragging our good friend Lynne to our door to see if Liz is available for a visit.

๐ŸŽตThe senior on the bus goes in and out.๐ŸŽต

It was so fun to spend time with Patty (17) in Denmark! We've rarely seen her otherwise, as she's been with friends,  played soccer, basketball or track.  She (sometimes with June) watched every episode of Bluey this year! Patty will attend UVU and has been preparing to go to the temple and serve a mission after graduation this spring.


๐ŸŽต The doer on the bus went swish, swish, swish! ๐ŸŽต

Once again Sarah had an amazing year with her art, music, game design, animation, writing, math mentoring, sewing, wisdom, grace, and humor. She’s attending UVU and hoping to do an internship next fall. She spent a lot of time, thought and money on her first tattoo, and used the event as an excuse for a nice mother-daughter get-away.  It’s beautiful, just like she is.


๐ŸŽตThe Mommies on the bus go, "sh, sh, sh!"๐ŸŽต

is June's (1 ½) favorite part of the song that's been on repeat since about February. When I asked Alexa how many times it has played that specific song this year there was a pause, crackle, and then the little cylinder exploded.

Junie loves ducks, meow-meows, baking, eating, playing in water, being outside, the moon, riding in laundry baskets, and playing "open it" with Christmas presents (a game Grandma taught her.) She's considerably cuter and smarter than any other child, probably.  The night she was dancing and singing, ๐ŸŽต"Grandma, grandma, grandpa, grandpa" ๐ŸŽตon our bed during a slumber party misnamed, we changed our will and deeded everything over to her.

๐ŸŽตใƒใ‚นใฎ่ปŠ่ผชใฏใใ‚‹ใใ‚‹ๅ›žใ‚‹๐ŸŽต

Andrew and Rashi are great parents and are excelling in everything else they do. 

They enjoyed a trip to Japan last fall, leaving Junie with her Abuelita and then us, which was very wise. They're welcome to travel anytime, as long as Mayli and Dailen are willing to take the  night shift. (They usually do.)


๐ŸŽต The wheels on the mower go round and round ๐ŸŽต

Mayli and Dailen Ferguson have been spinning their wheels at school (UVU) and work. Dailen's lawn care business has been very successful, and Mayli’s just started an online business selling care packages. She's been working full-time as a nanny and provides a lot of respite care for Becky. They're longing to adopt a baby; either privately or through foster care. Please spread the word.


๐ŸŽตThe quality of mercy on the bus is not strained๐ŸŽต

Anna's (13) middle school group and the school both won first place at the Shakespeare festival in Park City.  She's got great friends, a shiny new mouth full of money (braces), and is Junie's favorite toy.

๐ŸŽต There's no sleeping grandpa on this bus ๐ŸŽต

Paul's not even on the bus – he continued to work from home, but rode his bike into the office a couple of times a week. He's still programming for Find a Grave at Ancestry.com when he's not building batting cages at the HS, helping the robotics team, or cheering at one of Patty's games. He's been teaching a lively class of five year-olds at church.

Paul and a friend went on a week-long hike last summer, and they're looking forward to an 80 mile jaunt through the mountains in 2024. It sounds like my version of hell…I'm


๐ŸŽต The grandma on the bus! ๐ŸŽต

It's my (Jeri) favorite thing to be. Oh, the joy! 

I'm so happy that everyone has been safe, well, and nearby. It hasn't always been this way, and there are no guarantees, so this window of time is a gift. I’ve been using this relatively crisis-free chapter to do some trauma healing. My goal is to improve my health, see the humor in life, and start writing again.  Every day I've experienced God's love and grace, and for that I'm so very grateful. I witness that He loves us and we are His children. We can depend on Him.


We're thinking about you as we celebrate the birth of our Savior and blast this crazy-bus careening into 2024.           


๐ŸŽตAll through the town ๐ŸŽต


Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Keeleys and Fergusons



We invited Grandma Patty and Grandpa Rod to our Christmas Eve party this year and everyone opened a shirt to wear for the picture:
Front Row L-R
Dailen: Most likely to hate the Christmas T-shirts
Kate: Most likely to crash Santa's sleigh (this one should have been for Patty, who actually DID a couple of days prior)
Lizzy: Might as well lay under the tree; we all know that I'm the true gift of Christmas
Sam: The best way to spread Christmas cheer is teaching math to everyone here
Sarah: (Festive T-Rex) Fa-ra-ra-ra-ra, ra-ra, ra-ra!
Back:
Jeri: a festive Rocco
Anna: Most likely to be mistaken for an elf
Paul: Most likely to fart on Santa's lap
Patty: (broken gingerbread man) Oh, snap!
Andrew: Most likely to start the shenanigans
Rachel: Most likely to be Santa's favorite
Junie: a festive duck
Grandpa Rod: two gingerbread men partially eaten, one says, "My legs hurt" and the other says,"What?"
Mayli: Festive pineapple with sunglasses Mele Kelekemaka
Grandma Patty: Santa riding a cockatiel
Becky: Santa flinging cats merrily from the sleigh shouting, "Cats for everyone!"

Sarah posed us and took the picture.

Saturday, October 21, 2023

Victim's Impact Statement

Thursday was the sentencing from the car wreck that killed my mother- and sister-in-law almost two years ago. The driver pled guilty and spared us the hell of a trial. I'll love him forever for that because one day in court was enough to last me for the rest of my life.

This was my statement submitted to the judge which I was then not allowed to read in court. We were told to tell the judge something he didn't know and not to speak to anyone but the judge. This instruction was delivered to me just before it was my turn to speak. 

Not my favorite situation. I'm glad it's over.

Impact Statement Jeri Keeley



To whom it may concern,



My name is Jeri Keeley. I'm Becky's friend, sister-in-law and full-time care giver. She lives in our home. My husband is her older brother Paul but Becky and I been friends for over 35 years. 



Just before the car wreck Paul and I built an addition onto our home, with a basement apartment for an adult child with chronic health problems, and 2 accessible bedrooms and an accessible bathroom. We hoped one day that Becky would live with us if she desired to do so. Our daughter and my mother (who doesn't live with us) also use wheelchairs. We thought we might as well do it while we were building.



We truly thought we had 5-10 years before we'd have to face losing Nadine and maybe think about Becky moving in.



Nadine was a source of unconditional love, support and acceptance for me. She's been my "other mother" since I was 14 years old. It still takes my breath away to think that she's gone. I miss her every day. 



It was also hard to try to come to terms with Claudia's death. She was a huge part of our lives. We're still enjoying gifts that she thoughtfully gave us, clothing she sewed for us. She lived down the street from us for about 10 years and our lives intertwined.



It was unbearable to think about losing Becky.  That was a truly terrible night.



I spent almost every night in the hospital for the first month. 



Becky's ruptured diaphragm, broken legs and other injuries were so severe that we didn't even realize for a few days that her back was broken in a couple of places! She was covered with bruises. 



It makes me physically ill to remember the first time I helped an aid wash her hair. Even though a thoughtful nurse had painstakingly combed and cleaned it for hours that first night, I still found little pieces of glass in Becky's hair as we gently shampooed it.



Becky has an incredibly high pain tolerance, but because of her low blood pressure they just couldn't  stay on top of her pain. She was at a 7-8 on the pain scale almost constantly. 



The combination of a chaotic night, an arrogant doctor, a timid nurse and the fact that she threw up her feeding tube resulted in an entire night without pain relief for Becky very early on.



It was excruciating to watch.



 Becky was continually throwing up. She's thrown up hundreds of times since the car wreck. This isn't an exaggeration. We didn't know it at the time, but her entire alimentary system was almost completely paralyzed by the wreck.



Her stomach incision wasn't healing well. There were large blood clots. So the gastroenterologist popped open her staples, dug out the clots and left the wound open, packing it. He did this with my help in her regular hospital room, right there on her bed.  It wasn't nearly as fun as it sounds. Changing the packing was also no picnic. The area would later need a wound vac to fully heal.



A month after the accident I was forced to change my focus from Becky, who was stabilizing, to my pregnant daughter, who was dying. She lived, but lost her little girl in the second trimester. It was her 4th and final miscarriage and I was stretched thinner than I should have been. I wish I could have been with her more during that traumatic time.



My lovely daughter-in-law was pregnant at the same time and was also very ill. Her family lives out of state and I would have loved to help and support her. I wasn't able to.



When the insurance decided she was ready, Becky was transferred to a specialty hospital and then to a rehab facility. The level of care she received went down substantially with each transfer. 



To honor her privacy, I'll skip some of the horrors and indignities that Becky endured. COVID was still raging. Turnover rates were high. It was nightmarish. The assistance she received ranged from hilariously inept to life-threateningly dangerous.



Becky spent most of one night yelling for help and vomiting. The tech on duty got tired of helping her and ignored her calls. She vomited about 1/3 cup of black bile every five minutes. All night. When the morning nurse clocked in and came to check on her, she had aspirated and was starting pneumonia. She was also grey and gravely ill. They ambulanced Becky back to the hospital.



This was very upsetting to Becky because she hadn't had a shower since Monday and she was hoping that since it was Friday she'd get one. She was dying, and she just wanted to get clean. She was pitifully grateful for the help they gave her in the shower once she was stabilized. And it was pure luxury for her to shower every day while she was in the regular hospital.



What was Cody doing that week, I wondered to myself? 



Interestingly enough, the food Becky'd eaten the day before was still sitting in her stomach, undigested, going nowhere. The blood she'd been vomiting was from her throat. They'd neglected to renew her meds for acid reflux, and she was sneaking Tums to try to treat her severe heartburn. The rehab center doctor had just shrugged when she'd brought it up days earlier. It was hard to watch her go back to that nursing home.



Becky has lived with us since spring of 2022. 



She's very private. To honor that privacy, I'm not going into the details of her system paralysis. I'm just delicately going to mention that nothing moves through her system naturally, and SHE HAS ALMOST NO SENSATION/AWARENESS.



She knows she has to use to the bathroom because her stomach hurts. But it could mean that she's already in the process, that it's time to go, or that she's going to have a painful stomach for the next day or so.



Before the wreck, she could transfer from her chair to the car (with help); or to another chair, the tub, the shower or her bed by herself. Now she needs help with all transfers.



Before, she could wash and dress herself except for socks and shoes. She took care of all of her personal/toilet needs except for clipping her toenails. Now she needs help getting into and out of the tub, and help with all clothing below the waist. 



Sometimes she needs help getting clean. When this happens she's ashamed and apologizes all over herself. I think about Cody and how he might feel having his friend help him with personal stuff. 



I'm exhausted. 



I only have small windows of time when I can leave home because I need to be back to help Becky in the bathroom. If she hadn't been injured, she'd be able to go by herself at home,  and she'd be able to use the handicapped stalls in public restrooms. This was something she could do before but can't do without a lot of planning and only in the most equipped ones now. She's used a public handicapped restroom EXACTLY TWICE since the car wreck. 



 It takes about an hour and a half to get ready to go out the door if Becky needs to go somewhere in the morning. I can't go to sleep until after she does at night. She has PT twice a week (1 ½-2 hours) and a bath 3 times a week (which takes around an hour and 15 minutes). 


This leaves one day a week open completely for other appointments.



She's still fighting insurance. She's working hard to return to her previous abilities.



Becky got breast cancer and faced it without her mom.



Everything concerning the legal process is intensely emotional and stirs up all the waters.



My family has struggled.



One of my children still panics when I leave because she fears I won't come back. Nadine, Claudia and Becky had been returning to their home from our house at the time of the crash. 



It's been a rough adjustment for everyone. Becky went from a very quiet life alone with Nadine, to living in our home with 9 other people. She still has nightmares about the accident.



 Five of our kids battle mental illness. We're all still healing from the deaths and traumas. 



As previously mentioned, one of my adult daughters has severe health challenges, lives at home, requires full-time care and we struggle to meet her needs. She's no longer the oldest or the most obviously dependent. Her health has been affected. 



My 12th grade daughter was an assistant soccer coach at school to the middle school team, which won state last year. I missed the whole thing, and most of the Varsity soccer, basketball and track events she was in.



My 10th grade daughter is one of only two girls on her HS baseball team. Last month when she caught a pop fly and then ran to second and got a runner out in a triumphant double play, helping her team to ultimately win the game, I was at home helping Becky in the bathroom. I'd told her that I'd be there if I could, but it didn't work out and I missed her moment. 



I've missed a lot of moments. It's been hard on my health and my relationships.



My then-6th grader developed several tics to go along with her OCD since the car crash.



My mom has almost completely lost her vision to macular degeneration and I just don't have time to serve her like I wish to do.



Becky is on a low fat, low fiber gastroparesis diet and also can't have spices, tomato-based, or citrus foods. Luckily she can have dairy. My husband is  lactose intolerant. I have to plan meals to allow for both diets. 



We have a large, supportive community of friends and family who help a lot. But Cody's decision to "drive stupid" turned my life upside down.



I love having Becky here. I'm so thankful she lived! She's worked hard to relearn the skills that were already difficult for her to master. She's an inspiration to me, a good friend and she blesses our home. But it's hard.



For a long time I didn't know what I wanted from or for Cody. It doesn't really even matter.



Nothing that happens here in a courtroom will change anything for me and my family.



I was hoping that Cody wouldn't get the message that the consequences of his choice can be swept away with his parents' money, good connections and a 'boys will be boys' mentality, because I think this could be an opportunity for growth. I want him to know that his decisions had a huge ripple and continue to cause suffering that he'll never understand.



However, I also don't want to ruin another life; I just can't see what would be gained from excessive punishment.



 I have a son his age. 



I've thought about his mother almost every day.



I've done stupid things that could have gone badly; I need grace, too. 



Cody, It meant a lot to me personally when you pled guilty. I appreciate that you accepted ownership for what you did and that you actually stood and said the words yourself. Thank you for that.



I want you to know, Cody, that I fully believe that you can have a life of meaning and purpose regardless of where you are, what you've done or what circumstances you're in. 



Just like one bad decision can ripple, good decisions can reach just as far and bring as much good.



Becky's actually a great example of this. We have no idea how many people read her weekly newsletter, or take courage when they see her working so hard at physical therapy.  She's a gifted writer, remembers all the birthdays and anniversaries, and absolutely can't keep a secret to save her life. She's delightful to be around.



She started over and continues to do hard things and so can you.



Find reasons for gratitude. Find ways to serve. Recognize that good can come from difficulty. You're still here, so make your life count. 



I hope that the court will address the fact that someday Becky might possibly need more care than we can provide in our home. Partially this is due to her cerebral palsy, but there's no denying that her situation has been changed and her need for assistance has been significantly increased and accelerated by the thoughtless actions of this young man.



I also hope that you will address the medical bills that Becky is still facing. 



I hope that you can see that the quality of Becky's life was and continues to be drastically altered by this one event.



Thank you,



Jeri Keeley 



Saturday, June 12, 2021

Sarah Senior Tribute

Sarah 2021

 The year Sarah was born we were living in Massachusetts, and I had the greatest group of friends!  One of my best friends, Christy, had kids Mayli and Sam's ages and we spent a lot of time together. So when Christy and I discovered that we were both expecting and due only one day apart we were so excited!


Favorite newborn photo

2nd Favorite newborn photo (she made me include it)


The rejoicing was sobered in our 20th week when we discovered that Christy's baby boy had a lot of problems and probably wouldn't make it.  It became a sacred time as a I learned about faith, friendship and motherhood from my dear friend.

We were in labor together the night of the 18th, and as we spoke on the phone we were literally pausing at the same time to have contractions.  She called me around 10ish to tell me that they were heading to the hospital.  

I cried all night long and had contractions every 10 min. Every 10 minutes.  All night. No progress.  My doctor finally had mercy on me and told me to come in--she'd start me.  I was a wreck emotionally.

And then not even an hour after Sarah was born Christy called.  I was still in the delivery room.  I was surprised and touched at her thoughtfulness. My angel friend congratulated us, sent her love and gave me permission to be happy. I still can't believe that anyone can have that much grace. 

I felt so blessed to have this tiny, perfect baby.  Brock's funeral a few days later was terrible and beautiful.

The next days were really difficult.  I had postpartum depression, my legs were swollen and parts of me were cracked and bleeding.  Sarah was failing to thrive.  The pediatrician told me that my mom needed to stay at least another week. My mother was such a blessing and a strength to me!

Just before our moms left, Christy called and invited us to lunch.  She told us to bring Sarah Christine (who we'd named after her.). This was another beautiful thing that she did, which made it ok/normal for us to continue our friendship in a newly-strengthened, non-awkward way.  She even graciously took me up on my offer and occasionally snatched Sarah at church and took her to the mothers' lounge to rock and enjoy.  This made me feel like I had a way to serve her and helped with my "survivor's guilt." I can't imagine how hard it must have been for Christy.

My favorite part of this photo is the "writing on the wall" behind them!

Sarah was the most delightful baby!  She was so snuggly and happy.  I nursed her and supplemented with soy formula (she was sensitive to dairy and anything with flavor like everyone else) and she soon started to gain a little weight.  She was so pleasant to nurse--I had to force myself to wean her when she was almost 18 months old. I still love to snuggle up with her! Sarah has a powerful, loving presence.

She was born with a song in her heart and was always singing and dancing--as soon as she could sit up on her own she would do a little boogie thing that was so dang cute!

About the time she was one, we moved to Boise, ID.  



Sarah in Costume:

Sarah spent most of her early life in costume! At first it wasn't of her own choosing--there were 4 older kids who were loosely supervised at best.


As soon as she could, she started to dress herself.  And it was RARELY in actual clothing.

  
Sarah age 3

Alex the Lion came first.  We watched the movie Madagascar and listened to the song, "I Like to Move It" about 2,683 times that year.  She had some great dance moves, and was never happier than when she was wearing the costume and in FULL makeup to go along with it.  She was Alex the Lion almost every day for about a year.

Age 4

One of the best things that happened in Boise was the Breakfast Club that formed with a couple of good friends.  We all had 6 daughters, and belonged to very different religions.  It was so fun to have things in common and things that weren't, and we always had things to talk about. Sarah came along and spent a lot of time at Cracker Barrel.

She also started a fun preschool with a bunch of her friends, and we'd take turns teaching in our homes and go on little field trips once a month.  

She also started soccer with coach Daddy.

About the time she tired of being Alex the Lion, big sister Lizzy made her a new costume.

Link age 4
This was fun, because she would wear it to WalMart, where big teenagers would stop and whisper, "Look at that cute kid, she's LINK!" (From the Legend of Zelda)

Link was abruptly replaced one day by a sweaty pink dragon.  

Age 4-5
It was possibly the first appearance of a Pink Dragon in the Christmas Nativity Pageant at church.  (I wish I had a picture!) Luckily, we had a pretty outstanding Primary President, who had loved Sarah from the time she was her Nursery Leader, and who had even been known to play I Like to Move It in Primary when she'd been a Lion. Hooray for Shelley Martin!


We wondered if they'd allow a stinky pink dragon into Kindergarten, but luckily the phase (mostly) had ended, and I was able to wash the padded costume occasionally.

In Elementary school, Sarah consistently won awards like, "Class Peacemaker"

2010



Sarah had great experiences at school, until the day they researched names and their meanings.  She had always been the anti-princess who balked whenever a friend wanted to play barbies, paint nails or do anything remotely feminine.  So the girl came home from school one day and furiously announced that she'd learned the meaning of her name.  Sarah=princess  Worst. Day. Ever.

When Sarah was about 7 years old, we moved to Utah.



She spent a lot of time reading and acting out scenes from the Warriors cat books series with friends.  

She had a series of best friends who moved away, which was discouraging to her.

Her 5th grade year was spent with Mr. Asay, a remarkable teacher.  Here's Sarah in costume (again--temporarily) with a musket.  She learned a lot about history and patriotism.  

The fabulous Mr. Asay
5th Grade
 There was a boy in her class with autism who was being teased, and Sarah finally decided that she'd had enough.  She came home all wound up and wrote a letter to her class, explaining what autism is and telling them that it was not ok to tease.  The next day she asked Mr. Asay to read it, but he told her it would be more powerful if she read it instead.  She agreed and bravely read it to the class.  She was worried afterward, because she cried a little and it was embarrassing.  But it made a big impact on her class.

I have a dear friend in Boise whose son Drew has autism and he had been experiencing a similar situation.  He'd asked a boy at school if he'd be his friend if he made him a bracelet.  The boy rejected Drew's offer, and he was devastated.  My friend took Drew out to dinner to make him feel better, and a waitress explained the situation to some bikers who happened to also be at the diner.  They asked Drew if he'd make them a bracelet, and told him they wanted to be his friends.  My friend posted the story about her son on Facebook and his story had really touched Sarah.  Thousands of people were asking Drew for bracelets and reaching out to be his friend.  

I asked Mr. Asay if we could make some bracelets to send to Drew and some to exchange as a class. He allowed me to come into the classroom to do this.  We promised as a class that when we saw someone with special needs being teased or bullied, we'd stand up for them and be their friend.

I was so proud of Sarah and the lives she touched!

*By this time, she'd also been friends for about year with a girl from Japan who she was trading supplies with in an online game.  They weren't exchanging personal information.

Sixth grade was a bit of a struggle with her teacher, who was retiring that year, had some personality clashes with Sarah and was a little difficult to deal with.  Sarah worked really hard to get along with her, and by the end of the year they were friends.  It was a tricky situation and she handled it with a lot of maturity.

Sarah decided to attend Maeser Prep, a charter school, which required a uniform, and a little extra time and effort.  She had super teachers and some crazy-fun friends!  

She was a great student, creative and quickly recruited for the printcom (yearbook/newsletter) group and as a member of the Hope Squad.  She was also a peer tutor for a boy with autism.  

Things started to unravel in her life for a time.  Skim the small print if you want to.

She was (mis)diagnosed with ___.  The medicine she started didn't work. This was the beginning of a long mental health journey.

The Japanese girl she was playing online with had targeted Sarah. He wasn't Japanese and was definitely NOT a girl.  He and a couple of other men met up with her again on a My Little Pony Fan Fiction page, then carefully isolated her on Google Hangouts and continued to groom/abuse/manipulate/educate her.  They made plans to meet up in person.  Thankfully we caught it before it happened.  They did a lot of damage and stole her innocence. In a twist of irony the "Internet Safety" poster she'd created at school that week was leaning against the wall as the police interviewed us and packed up the electronics. We started group therapy at the Children's Justice Center, a place of healing and learning.  I can't say enough good about that organization!

Our ward boundaries were changed and Sarah became miserable at church.

Over the next few years, Sarah had her tonsils out, surgery on her nose to help her breath better, gastrointestinal procedures, etc. Pick a medical issue, chances are she decided to experience it.  So many medical things. This was NOT helpful to her overall wellbeing.

She was so depressed,  was having extreme anxiety and manic episodes.  Her various medications were barely touching it and having severe side-effects. A traumatic experience on the school grounds added another trigger to the list.

Sarah missed most of her 9th grade year of school.  But she didn't fail.  And she didn't die.  

I included the rough stuff because it's part of her story. It made her who she is. It wasn't public like a cancer diagnosis or terrible accident would have been.  There were no fun-runs on her behalf, and no Sarah Strong bumper stickers.  

What DID happen was a young child was attacked on two fronts, by evil, and by mental illness, and that child fought HARD.  She worked with teachers and administrators, therapists and doctors. And she emerged a strong, successful, beautiful human.

There were some really kind acts of love shown by friends and family that meant a lot when it felt like she'd been forgotten; many teachers and leaders who really went out of their way to let her know that she was loved.

Sarah changed schools her Sophomore year to get a fresh new start with old friends. She went back to the public HS. Her Senior year she only needed 3 credits to graduate, so she decided to take concurrent enrollment classes through UVU the entire year. Covid added another dimension of wonky to her entire Jr High/HS experience.  She's gonna love being an adult!

Sarah's learned how to truly see people, and learned compassion.  She's a good friend, especially to those who feel marginalized. 

She learned how to be comfortable in her own skin.  She figured out how to be exactly who she is without shame.  She can agree to disagree and still do it lovingly, even if she has to unfriend her own mother on FaceBook to keep her sanity. (sigh) 

She's incredibly likeable!

And Sarah learned that she's SMART.  When the dust started to settle, she looked around and noticed that school is easy for her when it's all she has on her plate.

Her exceptional artistic gifts have helped her heal and have also brought color, fun, money and further educational opportunities. The fun times are back.

Cosplay costume she made for ComiCon before stupid COVID shut down all the fun



She's introduced hedgehogs, liberal politics, awesome music, stunning art, henna tattoos, naughty words, new rules, LBGTQ+ youth and discussions, incredible fun, massive joy, melodicas, new viewpoints, quirky humor and a tiny bit of trauma into our family.  We need the unique gifts she brings.  She's one of the most delightful people I know!

A sampling of things I love about Sarah:

1.  Her sense of humor--She could seriously be a stand-up comedian!  The click-bait texts that she sends in tantalizing pieces throughout the day keep me rolling.  Her off-the-cuff comments and quick retorts are killers!  Just now when I was trying to make the pictures on this blog entry work out, she said, "You've got to take the pictures in a shady place."

"A shady place!?! Like, where?"

"Well, about the only place around here that I can think of is the State Liquor Store."

Then she turned off the lights to make it shady.

2.  Her ability to call BS and handle it swiftly and appropriately.  Some day I'll write the one about Slick Willy the Mall Kiosk Sales Guy and Sarah's quick thinking burst about being "bald soon anyway, you know, in solidarity with her child who has cancer which is why we don't need it" as she grabbed me out of his greasy clutches and saved me from buying a dumb curling iron I didn't want while I reached for my credit card as if in a panicked trance. She saved my life that day! ๐Ÿ˜„

3.  Sarah's artistic gifts.  She just seemed to easily toss out a 3D printer design creation for a contest and won a $400 scholarship for it. She sketches, paints, animates, does vocal animation, crafts, sews, writes.  She creates.  Somehow she visualizes and then makes it appear.  This will never cease to amaze me.




4. She's a hard worker, and sees ways to help.  This made her successful at Sonic, as a babysitter/Mother's Helper for a large family, and really helps me here at home when life gets crazy and she gets into a cleaning fit.

5. Sarah's loyal, and a good friend.  She's a lot of fun to be around.

She's graduated with a 3.8 GPA and more than a year of concurrent enrollment credits.  She'll continue at UVU this fall, with an academic scholarship, as one of a select few in the Honors Program, majoring in Computer Science, possibly becoming a game developer.

Her life will never be boring!  We're so pleased with the choices she's made and the woman she's becoming.

We love you Sarah!  Congratulations!